Are You Struggling to Find Joy This Holiday Season? Here's How to Navigate with Authenticity & Self-Care

The holiday season can stir up a mix of joy, pressure, nostalgia, and even grief. Many of us feel pulled between external expectations and our own emotional needs. This resource is here to remind you: your wellbeing matters, and you don’t have to lose yourself in the rush.

Honour Your Energy Limits

It’s easy to overextend during this season. Remember—saying “no” can be as powerful as saying “yes.”

• Choose the gatherings that truly matter to you.

• Plan downtime between busy days.

• Give yourself permission to leave early or rest when needed.

Evidence-based tip: Research highlights that keeping routines for rest, food, and sleep stabilises mood and reduces stress over the holidays (Psychology Today, 2024).

Allow All Feelings to Belong

Holidays can magnify both joy and grief. If you’re missing loved ones, struggling with family conflict, or feeling disconnected—know this is valid.

• Make space for your emotions without judgment.

• Journal, light a candle, or create a small ritual to honour what you’re carrying.

• Share with someone safe if you need connection.

Reflection prompt: What is one authentic emotion I want to name today—joy, grief, overwhelm, relief? Allow it to exist without needing to change it.

Create Traditions That Reflect You

You don’t have to do things the way they’ve always been done. This season can be an opportunity to shape traditions that align with your values and current stage of life.

• Keep what feels meaningful.

• Release what feels heavy.

• Add something new, even if it’s small—like a mindful walk, a quiet family ritual, or volunteering.

Permission slip: It’s okay if this year doesn’t feel festive. It’s okay to create your own version of “holiday.”

Protect Your Boundaries with Kindness

The pressure to say yes to every invite, every family demand, or every holiday task can be overwhelming. Protecting your boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s an act of self-care.

• Communicate gently but clearly.

• “Thank you for the invite. I need a quiet evening this time.”

• “I’d love to join, but only for an hour.”

When the Holidays Don’t Feel Joyful

For many, this season can highlight loss, tension, or loneliness. If you’re grieving, co-parenting, or navigating strained family dynamics, the holidays may feel more like something to endure than to celebrate.

• Grief: Absence can feel sharper during the holiday season. It’s okay to create new ways of honouring loved ones, or to keep things simple.

• Co-Parenting: Sharing holidays can bring logistical stress and emotional strain. Focusing on clear communication and your children’s needs can help ease tension.

• Strained Family Relationships: Not all gatherings feel safe or supportive. It’s okay to limit contact, set boundaries, or even opt out entirely.

• Loneliness: Social media often amplifies the idea that everyone else is celebrating. Remember—you are not alone in feeling out of step with the season.

Permission slip: It’s okay if the holidays feel heavy. Choosing rest, gentler traditions, or smaller connections still matters—and it still counts.

A Self-Care Snapshot for the Season

Keep these questions close by—print them, screenshot them, or use them as a quick check-in:

• Am I honouring my energy limits?

• Have I scheduled a pause or rest today?

• Am I noticing and naming my true feelings?

• Am I choosing what aligns with my values (not just expectations)?

Authenticity doesn’t mean rejecting the holidays—it means meeting them honestly, with compassion for yourself. Whether you embrace the festivities, take space to rest, or a mix of both, the goal is to move through the season in a way that feels gentle, sustainable, and true to you.

This holiday season, remember:

• Let go of unrealistic expectations

• More is not necessarily better

• You're allowed to speak up for your needs

• Connect with others

• "Family" is another way of saying "people who love, support, and care about me"

• Seek happiness in the small moments

• Embrace imperfection

• Focus on slowing down

• Prioritise stillness, laughter, and being present

• Practice basic self-care

• Set boundaries to protect your peace

• Be kind to others and yourself

• Take a moment to yourself if you need it

• Make space for whatever you may be feeling