Co-Parenting with Care: Understanding Shared Parental Responsibility After Separation

HRC
Jul 21
2 min read

At Hills Relationship Centre, we often support parents who are navigating the complexities of separation—not just the emotional toll, but the practical challenges too. One of the most important (and often misunderstood) aspects of post-separation parenting is shared parental responsibility.

What Is Shared Parental Responsibility?

In family law, shared parental responsibility means that both parents continue to share decision-making responsibilities for their children, even after their relationship has ended. It covers everything from the small day-to-day choices to the more significant decisions about your child’s health, education, culture, and emotional growth.

Think of it this way: your romantic relationship may have ended, but your parenting partnership continues. It’s about transitioning from couple to co-parents.

Day-to-Day vs Long-Term Decisions

Shared parenting doesn’t mean consulting on every snack or haircut—but it does involve being aligned on the big stuff. Here’s a helpful way to look at it:

Day-to-day decisions (like lunchbox choices or screen time) are typically made by whichever parent the child is with at the time.
Long-term decisions (such as choosing schools, seeking specialist medical care, or decisions around operations and diagnoses like ADHD) should be made jointly where possible and appropriate.

This approach protects the child’s best interests—and helps both parents stay actively involved in shaping their child’s future.

When Shared Responsibility Isn’t Practical

In some cases, the court may determine that equal shared parental responsibility isn’t appropriate or possible—such as situations involving family violence, neglect, or where communication between parents is unworkable. These are complex and sensitive matters, and legal guidance is essential.

However, in many situations, conflict doesn’t have to prevent cooperation. With the right support, many parents are able to work through difficulties and develop healthier communication strategies.

How Counselling Can Help

At Hills Relationship Centre, we support parents at every stage of this journey:

Co-parenting counselling helps separated parents develop respectful communication, manage boundaries, and align on parenting values and routines.
Parenting after separation support offers a safe space to process grief, navigate identity shifts, and prioritise the children’s wellbeing in a time of change.
Family counselling can involve older children or other family members to strengthen relational dynamics and reduce conflict.
Parenting consultations can support parents in making difficult decisions, especially around schooling, diagnoses, and emotional support.

Whether your goal is to create a consistent parenting plan, reduce conflict, or simply have a space to talk it through, we’re here to support you.

Imagine parental responsibility as a precious item carried by two handles. The moment one parent pulls, pushes, or lets go, the burden can become unsteady. But when both hold steady—despite differences—the child is supported with love, safety, and care.

You don’t have to figure this out alone. If you're navigating co-parenting or parenting after separation, we’re here to help you hold that handle with clarity and confidence.

Ready to take the next step?