Conflict is an inevitable part of any relationship, but how we navigate and move forward from it can significantly impact the strength and longevity of our connections. In this blog post, we share with you an exercise designed for couples to explore and understand their conflict dynamics, enhance communication, and build a stronger foundation for resolution. The exercise includes relationship connection questions for both partners, promoting open dialogue and self-reflection.
Relationship Connection Questions:
How would you describe your communication style in our relationship?
During conflict, do you tend to be more assertive, passive, or somewhere in between?
How well do you think you listen during disagreements?
How do you interpret my body language when discussing sensitive topics?
What can I do to let you know I’m listening and that I care?
Are you comfortable expressing your emotions during a disagreement?
How do you feel when I express strong emotions?
What strategies do you typically use to resolve conflicts in our relationship?
Is it more important to you to be heard, or to find a resolution?
Do you prefer to address issues as they arise, or do you feel there is a right time and place to discuss difficult topics?
How do you navigate situations where one person wants to address something immediately, whilst the other prefers to wait?
How do you know when a conflict is over?
How do you like to repair and reconnect after conflict?
How do you approach apologising to your partner after a disagreement?
What does forgiveness mean to you, and how do you go about forgiving your partner?
In challenging times, what do you do for self-care?
Who do you go to for support?
Is there anything you think we need to work on to improve how we navigate conflict? For example, communication, compromise, repair, etc.
Is there anything I have said or done during conflict that you do not understand? Would you like me to explain my words/actions/intentions?
What is one thing that I could do that you feel would change our relationship the most?
What can we do to build on our connection?
In moments when you feel angry, hurt, or upset, what do you need from me?
Is there anything that you find hard to talk to me about? How can we change that?
What are 3 things within our relationship that you are thankful for?
What things do I do or say that help you feel supported and loved?
Self-Reflection Questions:
What are my most predominant feelings when I think of conflict and disagreement with my partner?
How does conflict tend to affect me? For example, anxiousness, discomfort, disconnect, avoidance, hurt, etc.
What would help me to overcome my feelings around this?
Reflecting on conflict within our relationship, are there any patterns of behaviour that I am noticing?
How does conflict affect my relationship?
What would I be willing to accept? What won't I accept?
What is something I would like to argue about less within this relationship?
What can I be doing to help us move forward from conflict?
Encourage each partner to answer these questions honestly and openly, fostering a deeper understanding of each other's perspectives and needs. Use this exercise as a tool to strengthen your connection and navigate conflicts more effectively. Remember, the key to a resilient relationship lies in communication, empathy, and a shared commitment to growth.