Today we decided to pick Hailee's brain and ask her opinion on if you should leave a relationship if your partner doesn't seem to respond to your repeated requests to change?
Hailee - I don’t think you should necessary leave a relationship if your partner doesn’t seem to be responding to your request for change. I would suggest that you find out if your partner has understood exactly what you are trying to communicate, how important it is to you, and if they in fact know what to do in order to see change occur. If your partner does understand your needs and is unwilling to attempt to meet them, the question becomes, why? The answer to the ‘why’ will indicate if it is time to leave the relationship, or stay and work on it.
HRC - What are good reasons to leave a relationship?
Hailee - Many people leave relationships for any number of reasons, all of which are “good” reasons according to that person. From my stand point, there are a number of good reasons to leave a marriage or relationship. These include any form of abuse, including but not limited to psychological, emotional, physical, sexual and financial abuse, serial infidelity, issues around addiction or, if relationship becomes unsafe in anyway. It may also be a good reason to leave a relationship if you or your partner are unwilling to look at and address issues that arise in the relationship.
HRC - How do you know the right time to leave?
Hailee - I think you just know when you are done in a relationship. Once all the options have been exhausted, including working with a qualified relationship expert, you may need to decide to end the relationship, if that is what you want to do or, what is best to do.
HRC - What should you try first?
Hailee - You should try communicating effectively around the challenges in the relationship. If you don’t know how to do this or it seems to end badly each time you try, make an appointment with a qualified relationship expert who can guide you through the conversation and teach you new skills to improve your communication moving forward.